A man is walking on the beach, he trips on a mystical lamp and dusts i off a little. turns out that it was just a lamp, he droped it back on the sand and was arrested for littering.

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You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

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What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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What do you get when you cross an own and a bungee cord? My ass

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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why am i so sexy? I was raised by a dog.

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Q. Name six animals that live in the north pole A.Four polar-bears and two penguins

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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I'd really wanted to design a car, and then craft some sort of prototype dream car and concepts but sadly, I can't even draw a straight line.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Your mom is so skinny that she may have anorexia, yet she could treat it so she doesn't die.

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Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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American: Hi im American Hispanic: Oh hey

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Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops