why did the boy fall of his bike He got shot in the face

Why did the person write an antijoke? To get to the other side

What did the big traffic light say to the little traffic light? It didnt it's a traffic light.

Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

What did the fridge say when I opened it? Nothing.

A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

Women age like a fine wine: sediment develops as they lose their tannins, and earthy notes of oak and mineral develop in their flavor profile, giving them a lengthened finish.

A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

In an apartment complex, a black family lived on the first floor, a mexican family lived on the second floor, and a white family lived on the third floor. Suddenly, at about noon on tuseday, a giant tornado came through town and took out the entire complex, destroying everything. Why did only the white familey survive the catastophy? Because both parents were at work and the kids were in school.

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

A german walks into a London Pub. He turns to the man on his left and says, " Hallo Kolleginnen und dort bar Mäzen. Ich bin gespannt zu sehen, ob wir eine Beziehung herzustellen, wie ich gesucht Gespräch, als ich in der wunderbaren Kultur, die London zu bieten hat. Ist das in Ordnung mit dir? Heil Hitler"

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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