How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

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knock knock. Whos there? YELLOW PEOPLE

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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What is blue? The sky! Hahaha best joke to laught at with all of your buds hehehehehee

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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K

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

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What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

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why does paul mccartney not wear shoes? cause a nigga stole it

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What has two legs and bleeds alot? Half a cat!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops