Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

that wall over there ->

What do you get when you cross a chicken with a road? To get to the other side.

What's black and white and red all over? Half of a zebra.

What's better then finding an apple in the Holocaust? Finding a tunnel under the fence.

What do you call Willy Wonka when he is in Colorado? Willy Colorado.

What's the difference between a horse and a unicorn? Horses are real.

Wolfjob.

There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

What do you call a piece of celery with peanut butter on it? your moms dead

Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

What's better than a nice hot shower on a cold, rainy day? Osama bin Laden rotting away at the bottom of the ocean.

Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

Why did the little boy wipe his face with a towel? It was covered with his dog's blood after getting hit by a bus.

whats worse than getting no gifts for christmas? getting hit by a bus for christmas

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

Why did the downy jump off a cliff? I told him to.

What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

What did the little boy say to his malignant tumour? "Hello" The tumour did not respond.

AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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