Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did little Susie give to young Billy on Christmas? Genital Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

yo mama so stupid that when she stared at an orange jucie carton for 20 minutes cause it said consatrate

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

your social life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

your momma eats so much ice cream, you often find yourself without anything sweet to eat late at night when you're hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Does an Anti-Joke need to have an ironic punch line? ...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mom is so ugly, she suffers from severe depression and regularly contemplates suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is orange and annoying? A purple potato.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops