Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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Why was the Microsoft fan happy? Because Steve Jobs died.

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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Whats sad about 4 blacks riding of a cliff in a cadilac. It was a rental.

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

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How do you get a dog and a baby mixed up? You stir your chili.

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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whats worse than failing your maths test? getting aids

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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"Knock Knock" "You know the doorbell is working?" "Oh, well, you know I'm here now. May I come in?" "Yes, have a cup of tea"

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs 283 pounds.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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