Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

Sometimes when you drink sperm you choke

Roses are Red Toilets are Blue Get out of Me way I Need to POO!

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

Why did the Middle east send Doris a camel's penis? Because Uncle Monty's head was damn tasty

A man had sex with his secretary. She was his wife.

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name is Paco, And yours is too.

What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Make it? Sodium levels? Means he is eating right? Its not ADHD, the chatter is his way of coping with pain and what I believe is PTSD (dont tell him, he would get mad, if he gets that blank stare while chatting a lot its like he is back in the past for a while, please distract him out of it, but dont tell him anything about that. Give him what he wants, its a secret but Nero masters hypnosis, and he pretty much knows himself to a point far beyond others know themselves, he can sense lies and knows how others are feeling just by the movement of their pupils, their eyes, their breath, the tonality of their voice and lots of things like that, I think thats some sort of hypnosis as well, he uses ritalin in order to focus and shut off pain receptors mentally and stuff I don't understand, I am sure he would not ask for it unless he knew he could take it, he has literally performed surgery on himself before, the kind that would kill anyone unless under strong anesthetics. (removed bullets from the back of his skull, people say its just a myth, but I was there so I know its true) Please trust me on this as weird as it might sound.

adam sucks off disabled old men for a pac of biscuits

Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

Why couldn't the Indian kid read? He got shot in the eye.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

What's faster than a black man with a TV? olympic sprinters, cyclists, street legal cars, speed boats, helicopters, commercial airliners, bullets, fighters jets, missiles, SR-71, space shuttles, rocket ships, anything in orbit, excited electrons, and quite a lot more, actually.

yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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