What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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How you know when dislextic

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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Roses are red Im adopted

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

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if you can read this you dont' need glasses

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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