Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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