What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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your life

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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civil rights

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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And you honored it I see :P

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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