i saw amango it splootered

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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what did the hobo as the other hobo? do u have any cheese?

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

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Cancer

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

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Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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