(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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Maths.

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What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How you know when dislextic

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Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

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How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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Roses are red Im adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops