What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

Q.A duck walks into a bar and asks for grapes.What is the duck asking for? A. Nothing... Ducks can't talk

Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

Actually it was me Josh brown

What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

Roses are red Im adopted

why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

How you know when dislextic

A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...