Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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Did you hear the one about the black guy that went to college? Me niether

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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