Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

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My cake is yummy, It's icing is blue. It will always be mine, Come close and I'll punch you. So stay away from it And you will be safe, But if you dont listen, Prepare ice for your face!

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

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Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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whats funnier then a joke on anit jokes pracitcally anything cause anti jokes repaeats and everyone has herd them

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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