What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

like if your cool

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. The stewardess calls secret service and has the man arrested.

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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