A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

My grandma once told me " never trust the blacks"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

thumb_up thumb_down -15

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

96

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops