What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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Jesus Christ

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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why did the girl fall off the swing..? because she became unbalanced and the force of gravity extended on her was too great to prevent the fall

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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Whats green and miss centowski hates a gas chamber :D lets be friends

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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