why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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