What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Your son Your son who? Your son who’s sick of having a paranoid mother who won’t just open the door!

whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

Knock Knock.

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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