- Anti Joke

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

What do a cow and a banana have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

whats brown and stick? brown paint that has not dried yet.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Knock knock whose there alzheimers alzheimers who get in the van