there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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