What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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