A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

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Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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how did the kenyan get away from the cop He didnt he got arrested

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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Richard Nixon walks into a bar. Everyone is thrilled to meet a former President of the United States who returned from the grave.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops