A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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What's green and can read your mind? Nothing. Some people thinks the answer is a plant but don't listen to them because they are wrong.

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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what's the difference between a black man and a tricycle well the black man's a human

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How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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