Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Why was the little boy crying? He had a frog stapled to his forehead. Why did the little boy have a frog stapled to his forehead? Because Johnny just can't drive. Why can't Johnny drive? He has no arms and legs. Why does Johnny have no arms and legs? Cause Johnny is a potato! Why did Timmy drop his ice cream? Because he got ran over by a bus. But who was driving the bus? Johnny the potato!

Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

stinky boner

Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

24

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

Mum did you make my milkshake? No, I didn't son, but your father did. Fther's dead. I know.

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

How do you perform CPR on a black person. OK, first come down. I wish I could ask why you turned to Anit Jokes.com to ask this question, but this is serious. First, check for any air blockages using two fingers, then...

Q: Why is there never sun beaming at the castle? A: Because the castle is full of knights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...