I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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what did the apple say to the orange ? nothing, apples are a fruit and do not have any organs which allow it to be able to talk.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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A circus clown climbs to the top of a five-storey ladder and dives into a foot-deep pool of water below. His neck is broken on impact. RIP Chuckles.

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whats brown and sticky a stick

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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butt bananan appe aeriugbahrei bviaAETRGNARJEOGBAEROUGBAREOGABINGBIFDUVHR9EH VARVBNF V BAR GABNER UGH 8U78 6 78 C 877 86IHUR T HUGU GHG HU GHUG ERHU; BGIU AHUB HOAU AOH;UGG RJHI NJB NBJ NAJF BNJ NJ IJ BB B NNB UB OH UAERFNSKALDF AHUAWRETFBSUGFHAUNVCHCIWERCFO4F[U940RU320RY4 33 4TVNO34INRT4`UR1C34BT4567=95084651898549+0451467016849=80 .97.8

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One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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