A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

So, a man walks into a doctor's office. He says, "Doctor, it hurts when I bent my arm like this." The doctor tells the man that it is simply a sprained muscle after thorough examination.

What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

One time i was sitting down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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