whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

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"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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What do tigers dream of when they take a tiger snooze? Mike Tyson

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butt bananan appe aeriugbahrei bviaAETRGNARJEOGBAEROUGBAREOGABINGBIFDUVHR9EH VARVBNF V BAR GABNER UGH 8U78 6 78 C 877 86IHUR T HUGU GHG HU GHUG ERHU; BGIU AHUB HOAU AOH;UGG RJHI NJB NBJ NAJF BNJ NJ IJ BB B NNB UB OH UAERFNSKALDF AHUAWRETFBSUGFHAUNVCHCIWERCFO4F[U940RU320RY4 33 4TVNO34INRT4`UR1C34BT4567=95084651898549+0451467016849=80 .97.8

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

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What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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What do I hate? people

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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