When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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What is the name of Helin Keller's street, state and pet Street: Mahhehb State: Hahgre Pet: habdsa

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What do you call a child sitting alone in the back of a bus? Anti-social and on the verge of depression.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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So a bar walks into a man...

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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Communism hehe xd

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops