Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

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how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

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I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops