why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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