What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Jimmy Saville

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops