You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

Q: How many chicken nuggets can fit into an olympic size swimming pool? A: 8,563,690,152... Corndogs

Jordan is pregant

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

I am a mime

Golf.

If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee gettiing bigger and bigger and bigger.." Then it hits me.

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

why do the jewish guy and italian girl talk? i dont know why any decent minded italian would talk to a jew so i don't know.

Guess what What

I'm so punny.

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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