Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

Two men were walking down the street. All of a sudden, the first man turns to the second and pulls out his hands of 4 fingers each. The second man shows his hand of 6 fingers each. What does this show about them? Together they have 20 fingers total.

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

pudding

A: Knock Knock (waits for an answer) oh there's no one in.

Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...