You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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