Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babys taking them out with a pitchfork

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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what's the difference between a duck?

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

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Q: Where's the cheese? Who ate the cheese? A: How do you know it's been eaten because it's gone? Are you making the assumption that food that has disappeared was eaten because that is usually how food disappears? I am filing a lawsuit against you for your malevolent foodism.

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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