knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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Sigh, at times like this I begin to ponder what I am doing with my life. I do not look that much like some anime character thingie, she is awfully cute for a anime character though.

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

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whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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