LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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