What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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