Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

So this guy was making a sandwich...

Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

Knock Knock Who's there? Your friend, George. Oh hi George, I'll be there in a sec.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

Neil is a reterd.

Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

Golf.

What's green and brown, and if it fell out of a tree on you it would kill you? A billiard table?

What is colored and looks good hanging from trees? Oranges. Get your mind out of the gutter!

Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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