Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

dat shoe shine tho

I like to give help to people, expecting that they will be my slaves for life.

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

How do you make a snake blink? You can't

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

Whats two plus two Four!

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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