Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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