A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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You know what topping goes bad with ice cream? Chloroform

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

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Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

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Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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