Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

What did the teacher do? He taught.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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