Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

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I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

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Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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