- Anti Joke

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a prison. A gang stopped them, and said: Hey, want to play a game? Before they could run away, the gang leader told them the rules. You go over there and stand by the wall. You close your eyes, and then we fire a shotgun in your direction. The last one alive wins. They push the brunette onto the wall. She closes her eyes because she knows she's about to die and doesn't want her friends to see her crying. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. They decide it's the redhead's turn next. They move her onto the wall. Being the brightest one in the bunch, she tries to keep her eyes open. However, she blinks. The gun goes off, and she falls to the ground, dead. They pull away her dead body. Then the blonde bursts out laughing. "Your friends are dead. And you're about to die. Do you find that funny?" They ask. She answers. "No. It's just- I won the game!"

Did you hear the one about the flying turtle? No? Okay I'll tell you about it. So one day there was a flying turtle. His name was Larry and he was a turtle that can fly. However, nobody believed that Larry can fly and he wanted to prove it. So the next day George, who was a flying octopus, called Jerry on his cell phone and told him a story about a Larry. Jerry, who was a media reporter, was so offended by his story and called the police. Question: What did the police say? Nothing because it was a made up story

What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a d!ck you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now

What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

What did your Little brother get for Christmas? Lice.

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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