Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

12 in general

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

What's the difference between a police officer and a green dinosaur? They both aren't cabbages.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

A Duck walks into a bar.

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

eh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...