What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Boy: Hey girl see these arms? They are just dying to be wrapped around you! She stabs him dead End of story

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in an open hole Poor body disposal practice

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

thumb_up thumb_down -1

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Equal rights!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops