Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

So let's pretend two men that had been friends for a very long time, one man asks the other man how he is, so the man tells the other man how he is doing. Then that man asks the other man how he is doing. The two men were engaged in a very interesting conversation. What did the men do next? Nothing. We're pretending, remember?

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

Roses are red,vilots are blue just wait till I poo and till i kiss you

whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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