Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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