What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

Why did the Salesman leave the leper colony? He had to wish his daughter a happy birthday.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

what do you call one black man surrounded by ten white men.... A story teller

A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

360 NO SCOPE

If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

Obama = ebola

What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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