Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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were did the gay guy go nowere because it was raining outside

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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SHUT UP, yes you... WHAT DID I JUST SAY!!!!

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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Why are the asians on cabin services? Because they do not speak english well enough to converse with guests.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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