If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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What do you call a Black White supremisist? Well you see the Black man was blind and thought he was a racists redneck. He then contracted cancer.

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops